NEW FAMILY CONSTELLATIONS

Adaptation of the exercise “Healing the Heart” by GUY CORNEAU

To solve difficulties and suffering that have emerged in a relationship with someone.

Take a long time to reply to each question in order to experience the answers with images and feelings.

REMEMBER THIS PERSON with whom you want to heal something. It may be a current or past relationship, parents, brothers or sisters, a friend, a partner, etc. First, remember what attracted you of that person, and how was the overall story of that relationship.

ITS BENEFICIAL ASPECTS. Open up to the benefits that you received from this relationship, think of the needs that you were able to satisfy, without any criticism and without judgement.

ITS SHADOWS. Now open up to the negative, unsatisfactory, frustrating aspects of this relationship. Don’t look for coherence, or an evaluation of your memories, just what you experienced.

WHAT ARE YOUR REACTIONS TO THOSE DISSATISFACTIONS? What feelings did they produce in you?

WHAT UNMET NEEDS can those feelings be representing or awakening? Take the time to analyse the feelings created by the dissatisfactions of the relationship.

WHAT CAN BE THE HISTORY OF THOSE UNMET NEEDS? For how long have you had them in your life?

FEEL YOUR BODY UNTIL THEY SAY SOMETHING TO YOU: Let those frustrated needs take shape inside you. What would they look like if they had a consistency, a form? Contact with that form and ask it to say something to you. If nothing comes to you spontaneously, imagine the form they would take if they accepted to present themselves in one of your dreams.

YOUR COMPLAINTS AGAINST YOUR COLLEAGUE. Now think of your complaints, what hurts you of what that person does or doesn’t do with regards to the satisfaction of those needs of yours. Which is the person’s attitude that has made you suffer the most: his coldness, lack of understanding, intolerance, etc.?

COULD THAT BE YOUR OWN ATTITUDE TOWARDS YOUR OWN NEEDS? Could it be that deep down in yourself, you do to yourself what others do to you?

WELCOME YOUR WOUND, let it come out of its hiding place, discover its mission, its beauty, and let yourself be carried away by emotion and gratitude at its beauty.

CAN YOU ACCEPT THAT YOU HAVE A PART OF RESPONSIBILITY with regards to that part of yourself? What concrete steps can you take to satisfy those needs? Do you want to ask someone for something specific? What would you like to state, express, change or create in order to look after yourself as you need, to heal your wound?

SWITCH OFF THAT SCENE AND ENTER INTO A SPACE OF LOVE AND COMPASSION FOR YOURSELF. Accept your life and your difficulties, see the light and the beauty behind them, feel the light that expands inside you.

Feel how this bright light fills you, flows over you, shines throughout your body, through your whole life, through your needs, giving a new emphasis to all the moments of your life, and feel your confidence, your trust in life as it is, in you, feel the certainty that you are more yourself every day.